City Life Starter

Written by Scott Fiddler

The Word

Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.

Romans 12:15

Reflection

When I began writing last week I did not intend to write a series for introverts, but that seems to be where this is heading.  If you are an extrovert, you may still want to hang around though, so you can see how the other half lives.

Back in the old days of City Life Church we used to have a saying, “Every member a minister.” What we meant is that ministry is not just for those on staff but for every member of the church.  Our motto, “Participation is better than observation,” still captures the same idea, only in a more general way.

Here’s the problem: If you are an introvert, you are likely reluctant to talk to people. If you are reluctant to talk to people, you will be reluctant to minister to people, because ministering usually involves talking. Furthermore, talking requires coming up with some to say. 

When I was younger, I remember having this struggle. When I saw someone I knew was suffering, my introversion would counsel caution, as did the feeling that I must come up with the right thing to say. It was easier to just stay at a distance.

Then, at some point, I snapped to what the Apostle Paul is saying here: “weep with those who weep.” People who are suffering don’t always need our advice; they just need us. They don’t need our concern from afar—as Paul says above, we are to weep “with” them, not “for” them—they need our sympathy up close. We are to get a shoulder up under their grief and bear the load with them. 

The is another part to the scripture above, and that is to “rejoice with those who rejoice.” It’s right there with weeping with those who weep. In fact, it’s mentioned first, even though it’s often overlooked. It’s often overlooked because when things things are going well for someone else, we think they do not need us. Also, sympathizing with another’s suffering is easier than joining in their joy. Suffering naturally awakens compassion but success can awaken envy. 

For these reason, it generally take more character to rejoice with others than it does to weep with them. What rejoicing doesn’t take, though, is an outgoing personality or studied words of wisdom. It just takes you.

Six and one-half years ago, I made the move from the law firm I founded to the largest law firm in Texas to lead their Houston labor and employment group. The move was cause to celebrate God’s grace and faithfullness in my life and my career. A number of people congratulated me, but the one I will always remember was my friend, Darryl Flowers. He insisted on taking me out for a steak dinner, so we could celebrate. That Darryl cared about my success conveyed that Darryl cared about me.

Application

So, the good news for introverts is that there are opportunities all around to weep with those who are weeping and rejoice with those who are rejoicing, and to do so will not require you to make yourself an extrovert, only to make yourself available.

Prayer

Lord, help me always to see opportunities to rejoice and weep with others. Amen.